Monday #41: Father’s Day

Dar and Dad

I’m celebrating Father’s Day two Sundays early this year. I bring you this post from a bedside vigil I’ve been sharing with my mother and my sister. My father, pictured here with me just four weeks ago in what would be our last photograph together, was rushed to the hospital this past Thursday. With conditions that were not only irreversible but worsening, he was removed from all life support on Saturday morning as per his wishes.

If you have ever spent the hours watching over someone who is on their way to the next journey, you know there are many things to say, many tears to be shed, many stories to be told and many emotions to be navigated. It is a challenge, at this moment, to even attempt to articulate the importance of this man in my life… he has been my dad, my mentor, my confidant, my spiritual teacher, one of my best and most trusted friends, and, in many ways, my soulmate as an artist. The things I will miss with his departure from this life are too numerous for me to even understand right now and the ache in my heart is deep and intense.

This will also be my last post at 52 Mondays. While, I didn’t intend to announce these two things at once, it seems appropriate in a way considering that my dad was always my biggest fan here. Many of the posts, in fact, came directly from long, philosophical phone conversations my dad and I had over the almost four years I’ve been keeping this blog and, often, he would be the first to read and comment. As I posted last week, I have a new website (www.darsworld.com) and, in time, I will add a blog-ish section but I’ve decided that right now I need to move forward with some other parts of my life as an artist and put this on hold for a bit. It has not been an easy decision.

Thank you all for being a part of this experiment, for your beautiful comments and emails, and for all the ways you’ve told me you’ve been inspired, motivated or moved to thoughtfulness by my posts. I have grown so much as a human and a writer by keeping this blog and I am so grateful to you, my readers, for being a part of this. I have enjoyed becoming a blogger with you all.

I will leave the 52 Mondays blog up “forever,” whatever that means in cyberspace, and I will post any announcements about any new blog-ish thing here when it happens. Until then, I am wishing you all many more marvelous Mondays.

And as I spend these days beside one of the best human beings I have ever had the privilege to know and love, praying and hoping for his passage to be swift and painless, I will say this to you: Be kind. Always be kind to one another. Tell each other those important things when you feel them. Savor the little moments that, in our busy and hectic lives, are tempting to not notice. They will be the ones you cherish forever.

This photograph was taken just seconds before I left for the St. Louis airport to return to my life in New Jersey. The last thing my dad said to me is, “Dar, love is forever. It is the thing that remains.” Indeed.

Love, Peace & Blessings,

Dar

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About Dar Hosta James

I am an artist living in New Jersey. I write and illustrate children's books, paint, draw, blog, coach, teach and speak about creativity.
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21 Responses to Monday #41: Father’s Day

  1. Dar, my sincere sympathy for your family and what you’re going through.

  2. lynsirotaL says:

    I’m so sorry, Dar. Thinking of you.

  3. mrkitty2 says:

    Dar, My heart is with you in this time. Your words are eloquent as you. Sending you and your Dad prayers for a graceful and easy transition. I heard the following words from a song a long time ago and I copied them down on a scrap of paper that I keep taped to the front of my computer so I can see it every day. I offer them to you and your Dad.
    “Life is eternal
    Love is immortal
    Death is nothing but a horizon
    Horizon is a limit of our sight”

    Much love – Loretta

  4. Anonymous says:

    So sorry, Dar. It is indeed a difficult time in the life of a daughter to experience the passing of a well-loved, amazing father. My thoughts are with you and your family.

  5. Christie Juhasz says:

    What a wonderful legacy he has given you. May his love and your memories comfort you in the days ahead.

  6. janzart says:

    Dar. I have looked forward to your posts. Thank you. What a blessing to have such a great dad. I hope you write about him in your new blog. I am sorry to hear of his passing.

  7. CarrollWC says:

    Dar, my sympathies to you and your family.

  8. Thank you for your insights, Dar, and I’m sending mindful thoughts at this difficult time.

  9. Dee says:

    Dar,
    My deepest sympathies to you and your family. You were blessed to have such a wonderful, inspirational Dad in your life. You will carry him with you in your heart forever.

    When I read about you closing this blog this Carole King song came into my mind
    “Where you lead, I will follow
    Anywhere that you tell me to
    If you need, you need me to be with you
    I will follow where you lead”

    I look forward to following you on your new site. Hugs
    Dee

  10. Anonymous says:

    What a beautiful post Dar! You’ve been blessed with an awesome dad. I will keep you, your father and your family in my prayers. Peace….

  11. With tears as I finish reading this. A strong man. You can see it in his arms. So happy you posted the picture. Love, hugs, prayers.

  12. SallySally says:

    So sorry to hear about your dad Dar. I’ve really enjoyed reading your blog and find it very inspiring. Love to you and your family.

  13. Barbara says:

    Sending you much light, love and strength. Nothing prepares you, really, for this good-bye. Lean on those who love you, and be kind to yourself.

  14. Mary says:

    Sending you love and light Dar…this is such a beautiful tribute to your father. May you bask in each others love always <3

  15. Aimee Louise says:

    My heart aches for you. I teared up reading your soul bearing words. I knew your father was important to you because you took his name as your own, but I had no idea you had such a wonderful, fulfilling relationship. Your father was clearly a wise, loving, amazing man. I know you will continue to see him and feel him in your daily life and in your art. <3

    “When he shall die,
    Take him and cut him out in little stars,
    And he will make the face of heaven so fine
    That all the world will be in love with night
    And pay no worship to the garish sun.”
    -Shakespeare

  16. donna joy says:

    So sorry for what you are all going through-went through something similar w/my 96 yr old grandfather this past jan. It sounds like you had a wonderful relationship with him and have many happy memories

  17. Pam Swallow says:

    Dear Dar,
    I hold you in my heart as you face the sorrow of losing such a wonderful father. You and he were blessed to have the closeness and understanding that you shared. What a gift that was. I am sending you light and love. xoxo, Pam

  18. Anonymous says:

    Dear Dar,
    So sorry to hear about your dad. He sounds like a wonderful person, just like you. I am sure he was very proud of having you as a daughter. Thank you for taking the time to write all those beautiful and inspirational blogs every Monday. I always enjoyed reading them. Sending you lots of love and hugs,
    Lena

  19. Els Vlieger says:

    So sad for you, please take care, Dar.

  20. Anonymous says:

    I know just how you feel. Much love sent your way. Frank

  21. Freida Villepontoux says:

    I am sad to hear about your Dad. I too recently lost my wonderful step mom Louise. Life moves on but we will always carry them with us through the memories of our times together. My thoughts and prayers go out to your entire family.

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